And The Award For Biggest SCOAMF Goes To...

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure

With that outta the way, I thought I'd blow the dust off this place with the video of a sorely needed parenting lesson for the sperm and egg donors who are responsible for raising the shit-wit children who are and will be the downfall of The Republic.

The comments on Youtube are closing in on 60k and still rolling in @ several/second.

I'm 100% in this guy's corner, and after reflection, even his daughter admits she fucked up and deserved what she got.

Here's the link to Dad's Facebook page.

I don't think this kid is one, but there are ENTIRELY too many adults/kids who grew up/are growing up in homes that are sadly deficient in regularly scheduled ass whuppings.

And because I don't feel like going off on a rant, I'm just gonna leave it at that.

To My Friend SGT, JMFL

That stripe is long overdue, and I'm glad you got it.

You have earned it and deserved it..

Here's to you, Sergeant

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure

I just wanted to send El JEFe SCOAMF and Heinrich Holder a little Christmas note...

Watch where you step, motherfuckers, because me and millions like me...

BITE.

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure

Jedi Knights are cool.

Ninjas are cool.

But what's cooler than liquid nitrogen??

Jedi Ninjas.



I was talking to my other Brother from another Mother the other day and the conversation strayed to whether we should have Nuked Hiroshima and Nagasaki or just done a demo drop in an uninhabited area and I remembered what Capt. Ramsey (Gene Hackman) said in Crimson Tide...

"If someone asked me if we should bomb Japan, a simple "Yes." By all means sir, drop that fucker. Twice!"

I'm just glad we didn't nuke all the Ninjas, otherwise we wouldn't have cool vids like the above...

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure

And there isn't a truck on the planet big enuff to haul all of his staggering clusterfuckery. But other than that quantum singularity of incredible failure, you can find a truck to take care of anything you need hauled...



Going out on a date?? Go in a truck. If you get lucky, you'll have a bed that never has to be made...



Of course, as Truck Tech has improved, so has ride quality, and nothing smooths out the ride of a truck like independent front suspension...

Get Yer RANGER On at RANGER SCHOOL!!

Oh yeah, Obama is a Stutttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure who is OFFICIALLY The Worst SCOAMF to infest 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

Congrats Jimmy, you fuckstick, you're off the hook for that title.

Game Over, Man, Game Over!!

ALIENS: COLONIAL MARINES

I'm Gonna Have To Watch TV Tonight...

ABC's "20/20" @ 2200 eastern -

Not Photoshopped: Beam of Light Shines on Fallen Soldier’s Miracle Dog

Reported by ABC News’ Kimberly Launier:

It was an overcast day in Newport, N.H., when a simple “20/20″ shoot turned into something that made me wonder about life after death.

I was filming soldier Justin Rollin’s parents Skip and Rhonda playing with their dog Hero, whose rescue from the Iraq War zone where Justin died was nothing short of a miracle.

Sometimes when Rhonda hugged Hero she would softly pet her face and coo, “Justin, are you in there?” It was Rhonda’s gentle way of remembering their son and his last living connection to Hero. At one point, Hero wandered off and took a stroll in the backyard. All of a sudden, the clouds broke and a light began to solidify in a beam directly down on Hero — a kind of vertical halo.

Here's Justin and Hero in Iraq -

Read Justin and Hero's story here.

Happy Birthday, Baby.

Daddy loves you, and I miss you terribly.

Josie Dog - Thanksgiving Day, 1996 - 11 AUG 2010

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

Update to last post- They caught one of the ghetto scum that fucked up my friend. Hopefully this will lead to the rest of the shit stains being arrested.

And if I have offended some of your delicate sensibilities, get over it cupcake.

Let's see how you feel when a friend of yours gets the shit kicked outta them by a pack of subhuman animals that feel they are entitled to trespass on private property and FUCK YOU CRACKER IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT!! just because they happen to be the same general skin tone as SCOAMF and Ain't prosecuting no black on white hate crime cuz de bes "My People" Holder.

Or had you not noticed the rise in black on white crime since NOV '08?? Mebbe if you had you would have noticed that the "Flash" mobs that are destroying private property and stealing whatever they want or beating the shit outta white folks at the Wisconsin fair are 100% blacks getting their retribution from whitey...

Wake up and smell the "reverse" racism, snowflake, or continue to turn a blind eye to it and hope it goes away, I don't give a fuck what you do.

But I can think of better ways to piss away trillions of dollars than to pour it into the black holes of the ghettos around the country. Been doing it since the 60's, thanks LBJ you fuckin' prick, and ain't seen no return on the investment yet.

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

And because he and his subhuman spawn infest 1600 Penn. Ave., niggers think they own the world..

Well I have news for you primates, your nigger in chief will not protect you should I find those that beat the shit out of a friend of mine last night...

I will put a 0.45 inch hole in your fucking skull and go home and sleep a good night's sleep afterwards...

I OFFICIALLY HATE ALL NIGGERS.

I GOTTA GET ME SOME OF THIS!!!

If you can, select 1080 HD and CRANK IT UP!!



FUCK YEAH!!

UPDATE -

M4E, I think this is what the "Soldier In All Of Us" refers to. And I think it's a pretty good representation of the "Life Taker And Heartbreaker" that lives in all Gamers...



I especially like the "Concierge..." dude answering his phone... He's playing the game and sez, "SHIT!!! I'm up to me ass in Bad Guys, and some fucker wants extra towels?!?! FUCK!!!"

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

And in other news...

If there is anyone who needs to be thrown an Ass Whuppin' more than those Occupy Whatever hippies, it's internet tuff guys talkin' shit from their momma's basement.

Especially "Anonymous". These pecker puffers are ready to eviscerate you with a rusty spoon, but won't even leave at least a handle on their posts...

Exhibit A from comments on the last music video thread:

"Anonymous said...

You are a colossal idiot. Bus driver.

What a worm. Pencil-dicked scared white-boy loser.

Bus driver.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Go to hell, tinydick white cracker shit."

And ....

"Va te faire mettre, morceau de merde."

Apre vous, fuckface...

So this loser is either a brown liberal or a brown frog or a wannabe troll... Whatever, here's your 15 minutes of fame ballsack, so enjoy it..

In your honor, I post this...

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

Today's Playlist -





She was gonna shake her ass on the hood of Whitesnake's car...





Noize?? That's ROCK!!





Twist your sister?? I wanna ROCK!!



How old's yer sister??



To all the girls I've loved before... who've treated me like a used tampon..



Missing a rib, part of a kidney and an appendix... I think I'm..





Coupla hotties..





In case you haven't guessed...

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

...And in other news you can use, it's FRIDAY. baby!! It's Tune Time, and I'm in a Late 80's/Early 90's mood...

First off, from the man men wanted to be and women wanted to be with...









And now a word from Uncle Sam...



Yeah, I'd hit it...



I LOVE the ending...





Not loud enuff?? TURN IT UP!!

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

And in other news, I think I've become a Blugrass Junkie...



I may need an opera intervention...



Once you go Blugrass...



Bear with me, just have some...



Just One more...



Don't ever let anybody tell you Blugrass sucks...

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

...But you knew that.

In other news, I had my one year post partial nephrectomy tumor removal testing done this past Tuesday. Sweating those bullets is the main reason for lack of activity here. But after blood work, CAT scan (no cats detected), and a video exploration of my urinary tract, I am pleased to report that the results were so good that instead of a return engagement in 6 months, my next visit is a YEAR from now.

While Doc was scoping my my bladder, I got medical confirmation of the State of My Package...



In fact ,the news was so good, I wanted to...



I got so gassed, I went outside and...



Running around St. Louis, I got the feeling that I was...

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

...And in other news, rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated... And I'm in a Bluegrass state of mind...

...But not yer Daddy's Bluegrass...



Beelzebub prolly has a devil set aside for me for posting this stuff...



This prolly the devil I'll be runnin' with...



Grasstallica??



BRB... I need to find me some more grass...

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

...And in other news...

And speaking of wastes of sperm, one of the kids I tote around during the day on the bus was bragging how he "makes" over $400/month. Now, when I was in school, 4 bills a month was a salary for a grownup and a fortune for a High School kid. So I ask him where he works to make that kind of scratch....

This simpering fuckweasel leans back in his seat and BRAGS that he gets it from SSDI and how I'M paying for it.....

Almost all of the other kids I transport during the day receive some sort of assistance 'cause they be 'Tards or physically handicapped, this I have no problem with. But to give money to some skidmark whom the best part of ran down the crack of their momma's ass and ended up as a brown spot on the mattress???

This pisses me right the fuck off. To pay some punk just because they are socially maladjusted due to the fact it's sperm and egg donors are capable of fucking and not capable of parenting is FUCKING WRONG!! This is the kind of human debris that needs to be starved out. Join civilization and be productive or fucking die!! There is nothing wrong with this piece of shit that a few properly applied ass whuppings could not have prevented.

I'm gonna go watch Jack Bauer shoot some mooslime piece of shit in the kneecap before I really get pissed....

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

...And in other news... (this may ramble a bit, so bear with me...)

Protect and Serve is RIGHT OUT.

Remember the Good Ol' Days when you could call 5-0 and report a suspicious person and they'd roll up and scan the area and get out and look around and if it was night time, you'd see spot lights and flashlights scanning the dark looking for the possible perp?? And then after leaving no hiding spot unchecked, they'd either bust some fucker or say said fucker had split the scene???

Remember that???

Yesterday (12 OCT), my "Baby Sister", wife of J.M.F.L. who's on his way to Kuwait, and their almost 2 y/o son, whom I've sworn to protect and defend in his absence, were at the local carwash. Mrs. JMFL was cleaning out the car when JMFL JR. started asking, "What's that?? What's that??"

She looked up to see some fuckbag piece of shit jacking off. I don't know if he was looking at her or him, but she jumped in the car and got the fuck outta Dodge ASAP.

FYI - The best description I got was white male, mid-late 30's, lots of facial hair in a white truck. If you see this piece of shit, please detain him until I can get there to skin and eviscerate him alive...

Had I been there, he'd have gotten a .45 ACP 230gr. JHP Mozambique +1*...

This evening (12 OCT), freshly showered and enjoying a cool, refreshing adult beverage in my back yard, I see a black male, appx. 6' tall, med/lg. build, wearing dark clothes jump into traffic, stand in the middle of the road and take a coupla drags offa his smoke, jump back into traffic and head into the garage/tire shop parking lot down the street and disappear...

In the first case, I'm sure that I've done more investigative work than the local P.D. by asking the surrounding business's if anyone saw anything or if they have security cams that might have recorded anything...

(Negative on both counts.)

In the second case, I called it in, and watched as a patrol car pulled into the lot, and pulled out after MAYBE 2 minutes. During which time I never saw so much as a headlight circle the parking lot, and heard Office Friendly on the scanner radio in, "Unit Fucknozzle, 10-28... U.T.L...."

U.T.L. = Unable To Locate. Should be, "Unable To Look, 'cause I might drop my fuckin' donut or spill my coffee..."

Fuckwit, fatassed, shiny bottom trouser wearing motherfuckers....

I LIVE IN SMALL TOWN, HEARTLAND AMERICA AND THIS KIND OF SHIT HAPPENS HERE!?!?!

Had I been there with Mrs. JMFL, the fuckbag would have been lucky to leave the scene with a pulse, but I guarangoddamnfuckingtee you I'd have been cuffed and stuffed.

It's nofuckinwonder that larger cities are fucking sewers full of grime, crime and slime outside of the tourist areas... (SEE: The places that are full of welfare brood sows and the ghettos, BIRM..)

The ONLY thing the cops are supposed to do is draw a chalk line around your room temp body and pretend to try and solve the crime.

REMEMBER - When SECONDS Count, The Police Are MINUTES away...

Now, if you will excuse me, I'm gonna go back to checking mags and weapon maintenance .........

(*.45 ACP 230gr. JHP Mozambique +1* = The "+1" would have been the first shot to the groin, thereby reducing his pathetic pecker to so much hamburger meat. The rest would be 2 center mass and one between the eyes.)

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

...And in other news...

I'm in an Ozzy state of mind.

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

...And in other news, FKOTUS M'Chelle S'squatch O'SCOAMF is a staggering hypocrite whose ass has it's own gravitational field that has to be factored into navigational calculations.

Between the two of them you have the reason I stopped watching Food TV.

When Paula Deen met Michelle Obama, it wasn't exactly the queen of butter versus the first lady of garden greens. Deen, known for her delicious not-so-good-for-you recipes like Gooey Butter Cake, said the two women had more in common than you might expect.

Lemme see... They're both no stranger to food and both from the same political party. Other than that, I don't see too many similarities. Miss Paula is a polite Southern woman, FKOTUS M'Chelle is a ball busting, screeching harpy.

Deen will "Southern Hospitality" your ass into a coma w/ a wheelbarrow full of comfort food,

The Wookie will illegally overstep her bounds and legislate you eat shredded cardboard w/ soy "milk" at the same time she unhinges her mandible and consumes a whole BBQ chicken or side of ribs with a quart of ice cream and chocolate sauce chaser in one bite.

"Well, I did a show with Michelle and I just loved being with her," Deen told Yeas & Nays.

Same-same as the show she did w/ Jimmuh Carter, the only person that ever made HM1 Dad dig DEEEP into his Squid/Jarhead Vocabulary of the Profane in front of women and children. Now I know how he felt.....

"She probably ate more than any other guest I've ever had on the show — she kept eating even during commercials."

"Bless your heart... Would you like a SHOVEL with that, dear???"

Deen taught Obama SCOAMF how to fry shrimp during a TV segment in September before the 2008 presidential election. "You know what their favorite foods are — it's hot wings, you know, those kinds of foods that are not necessarily top-of-the-list healthy foods, so she's no different than the rest of us," Deen said. "We love those kinds of foods, we just know that we can't eat them everyday."

Unless you're FKOTUS and have a squad of highly trained, armed men around to ensure you get what you want....

The culinary superstar also said she supported the first lady's initiative to get more Americans gardening. "So I love that," she said. "I was really happy to see her encouraging children, you know, to plant their little gardens."

I love to put out a garden, and I eat damn near every bite that one produces, but I don't need a Klingon Kunt with an ass the size of a dinosaur killing asteroid to order Storm Troopers to make me garden at gunpoint, while at the same time SCOAMF and the Dem Cong work on legislation that makes gardening a violation of the Commerce Clause.

"Gimme dat chicken an' waffles, bitch..."

Whupass, Can Of. Quantity - One (1)

...And in other news - I received this from my Bro SPC. J.M.F.L., USAR - Kuwait...

"C-____ rollin' down the strip... AIRBORNE!! daddy gonna take a little trip..."

Fill in the blank with the correct ID of the "Big Ass Bird" in the photo, and win a FREE lifetime subscription to SCOAMF.com..

(I'll save the "Whoopass" vs. "Whupass" Spelling Nazi shit for another time...)

UPDATE!!

We have a winnah!! Marine4ever correctly ID'd the aircraft in question as the Mothership from 'V'.

(It's not really the mothership, but don't tell M4E that, it might hurt his widdle Jarhead feelings. Being as Marines live and thrive on leftovers and makeovers from the 60's and 70's, he prolly wouldn't know a C-17 if you parked it in his driveway... But ya gotta love 'em, otherwise they'll drive an AMTRAC thru the kiddie pool and hit the sandbox in the backyard in the middle of the night, and, even though your house is just yards away, find and hump thru 20 miles of shit that would make a Honey Badger say. "Fuck this!" and slit yer throat... 'cause that's what they do.)

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

...And in other news....

This is what I be jammin' to..





I needs me a TV Tray wit dem legs...

And speaking legs...



And speaking of TV Trays...



Give yerself some bonus points and a gold star if you remember the foil covered and wrapped TV Dinners that took almost an hour to prep in the oven...

I guess you could say I'm in a ZZ Top state of mind...



And one from the man who had so much pussy he could throw some away and never miss it...

The King, Baby...



Thank you.. Thank you very much...

For My Wife And My Family And My Friends - I Love You.

About a month from now I go in for my 1 year, post partial nephrectomy to remove a tumor from my right kidney cancer check up. So far all the tests and labs have come back groovy, but every time I have to go in for this, I get the heebie-jeebies, willies, or what the fuck ever ya wanna call worrying about the news yer gonna get.

I went from, "Gonna be dead 5 years from now..." to every thing looks good for someone who has two WHOLE kidneys in the space of a year. And I swear to all the gods and goddesses that if I ever see the quack that almost killed me on the OR table and scared the shit outta The Ol' Lady w/ the above prognosis, I WILL SHOOT HIM IN THE FACE.

Just goes to show that you should get a second opinion from a second Doc not involved w/ whatever institution you happen to find yourself in. EVEN FOR A FUCKING INGROWN TOENAIL!!!!

But for some reason, this tune has popped into my head and will not quit playing, so I thought I'd lay it on y'all....



And like the song sez, this is one of the most beautiful things I have had the honor of seeing..

A big Baldie fixin' to snatch a fish outta the Current River.

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

...And in other news...

Political Correctness needs to Fuck Off And Die In A Fire.

In case y'all didn't know, I drive a school bus/rolling petri dish/primate house...

The other day a driver radioed in stating that the primates had basically started a riot and were screeching and howling and throwing shit, and would not listen to instructions to Sit The Fuck Down And Shut The Fuck Up.

Dispatch answered with, "Well, get their names and write them up and we'll wag our fingers at them come Monday..."
BULLFUCKINGSHIT!!!

 
What the fucking fuck?!?!?!? That Driver should have been able to turn around and gone back to the school and have the principal pull those fucktards off the bus, kick their asses and made the "parents" come and get the little fuckers.

A MAJOR part of what's fucked up with this Republic can be traced DIRECTLY back to the public school system. God forbid you discipline a fucking kid 'cause you might dent their pwecious widdle self esteems. "Well, they're growing up the way nature intended.."
BULLFUCKINGSHIT!!!

 

When a dog shits on the floor or chews some shit up, you kick it's ass and it learns to not fuck up like that any more. Same same for a fucking kid. It doesn't know any better 'til you teach it better.

But when you have cum dumpster uterus life support systems passing child substitutes like they were turds and shacking up w/ 17 year old sperm donors and a video game system for a baby sitter that the offal will play for hours but still be diagnosed w/ ADDHADMOUSE, and all of them sitting around waiting for the food stamp card to be recharged and the welfare check to come in...........

We either need a revolution to kill all the liberal/commie/fucknozzle supporters of the welfare state and unfuck this fucked up situation, or another asteroid to wipe the slate clean and let the cockroaches give it a go...

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

And in other news, I just developed my own brand of Hot Sauce. I call it "Kleen Up The Kitchen Holy Fuckin' Shit It's Hot Sauce!!" "ZOMBIE SAUCE!!" I took the remains of about a dozen bottles of different hot sauces, jalapeno, habanero, chipotle, multi-pepper blends, and so on, put them in the blender for a spin and bottled 'em up in the containers I had on hand.

Here's the result -

This ain't no weak sauce...

Not only is this bastard child of a dozen mothers hot, it tastes good too.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT, BATMAN!!! Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

...And I be famous an' shit!!

While figgerin' out The Ol' Lady's IPad, I googled "SCOAMF" to find my blog.  It turned up as the #2 result.  Curious, I went to her laptop and Binged it....

FUCKING NUMBER FUCKING ONE OUT OF TWENTYFUCKINGFOURFUCKINGMILLION, NINEFUCKINGHUNDREDFUCKINGTHOUSAND, BABY!!!!

That's right, Bitches... I'm Bad and I'm Nationwide

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure...

And in other news, so is Easy Reader.



From Newsbusters via Gateway Pundit -

PIERS MORGAN, HOST: Has Obama helped the process of eradicating racism, or has it in a strange way made it worse.

MORGAN FREEMAN: Made it worse. Made it worse. Look at, look, the Tea Partiers, who are controlling the Republican Party, stated, and what’s this guy’s name, Mitch O’Connell. Is that his, O’Connell?

MORGAN: Yeah, Mitch McConnell, yeah.

FREEMAN: Mitch McConnell. Their stated policy, publicly stated, is to do whatever it takes to see to it that Obama only serves one term. What’s, what does that, what underlines that? “Screw the country. We’re going to whatever we do to get this black man, we can, we’re going to do whatever we can to get this black man outta here.”

MORGAN: But is that necessarily a racist thing?

FREEMAN: It is a racist thing.

MORGAN: Is it not Republicans, wouldn’t that say that about any Democrat president?

FREEMAN: No, they would have gotten rid of Bill Clinton if they could have.

MORGAN: They tried.

FREEMAN: They did try, but still. I don’t, they’re not going to get rid of Obama either. I think they’re shooting themselves in the head.

MORGAN: Does it unnerve you that the Tea Party are gaining such traction?

FREEMAN: Yes.

MORGAN: Why?

FREEMAN: Well, it just shows the weak, dark, underside of America.

AAANNNDDD another Whollyweird shitferbrains opens his festering gob and consigns more of my DVD collection to the dustpile...

So, what am I supposed to do, Easy Reader?? Flush common sense, logic and love of Country down the shitter just because some half-white, half-arab half-wit that shares your skin tone managed to bullshit his way past the 52% of voters in this country that don't have two fucking brain cells to rub together and get hisself into public housing @ 1600 Penn. Ave.???

Fuck that.

I guess I've been shoved full circle - from growing up in a racist family where anyone brown was a nigger, to learning from Easy Reader, Lt. Uhura, SSGT. Bowens and SGT. Crawford and others that brown folks are just folks and that nigger is an attitude that ALL colors of folks can have, back to just because if I don't like the commie, America destroying policies of SCOAMF and his fellow commie travelers, I must surely be a racist.

So if I'm to be accused, tried and found guilty of being a racist, I might as well earn the scorn heaped upon me...

(**dons white robes and hood and adopts best Animal Mother voice...**)

ALL FUCKING NIGGERS MUST FUCKING HANG.

There. Are you leftist, commie cocksucking SCOAMFs happy now??

Fuck all y'all.

UPDATE - I'd forgotten about this one. Via Dr. Varno @AOSHQ...

"2005: Morgan Freeman: How are we going to get rid of racism? Stop talking about it!

2011: ...[facepalm]"

Jason Aldean Gets Thrown Under His Big Green Tractor

Two of my best friends are the wrench benders at the garage.  They also happen to be farmers.  And they dig "Tractor Porn".  I'll catch them on break or lunch lookin' @ John Deere tractors for sale on The Net, and accuse them of watchin' "Tractors Gone Wild".

There is also country music on the radio about 99% of the time, and that is where I first heard the song "Big Green Tractor" and thought, "Hey, that's pretty cool".  And when The Ol' Lady said she'd go for a ride w/ me if I had a J-D, I swore one day I'd own one, even if was a little one.



Then she wanted me to listen to Aldean's latest hit, some kinda bastard child of Country and rap, which now also justifies the term "Crap Music", 'bout swerving down a dirt road.  So just listening to it kinda put me off of "New Country".  But when I just went to the head and she had Pandora radio on the tube in the bedroom I saw the info about the song and it said, "Jason Aldean FEAT. Some Shithead..."

I've figgered out if "FEAT" is in the title, IT IS SHIT!!  So Jason, you're under the tractor, and the bad news is there's a big ass bush hog running full-tilt boogie behind it....

And while I'm on the subject, that greasy, red spot on the other side if the field??  That's the Ditzy Twits from a few years back...

I'm not saying I've completely turned off "The Next Generation" of Country Music...  I have no idea what this next video says, but HUBBA-HUBBA, who cares??



Sara, baby, ya need to get outta the desert and get back to a real Country Boy. But if not, like a good Troop, I have a back-up plan...



I bet Gretchen can change the oil in my truck...

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure

And in other news, the brave LEO's of York PA. cite a 91 year old man for taking measures to keep asshole, wild animal "youths" from gathering on his front porch and yard and banging on his door and peeping into his windows at all hours of the night.


And what measures did Albert Einsig take?? Calling the cops??  Swinging a ball bat?? Brandishing a weapon?? Harsh language??


Nope. He poured a bucket of piss on the front porch and walkway of HIS OWN PROPERTY. 

5-0 couldn't be bothered to apply a liberal amount of Tac-Boot leather to some well deserving, possibly rowdy punks, but to write a defenseless old man a ticket??  I'll bet they un-assed Dunkin' Donuts like somebody yelled "FREEBIES AT KRISPY KREME!!" and ran Code 3 to get there. 

Fucksticks.

(DISCLOSURE - I was a MP, and generally have a great deal of respect for LEO's, but this kind of candy ass, no load horse shit pisses me right the fuck off.)

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure

And now the WHOLE world knows it. I guess by now you've seen the pic of all the World Leaders and SCOAMF in which King Putt just has to be different.



NO?? You haven't seen it?? Well lemme try a new blog trick and catch you up...

A Man Whose Man Card Is The Size Of A Billboard

And you should go buy his book.

Larry Correia, writer of "Monster Hunter International" is pimping the first book from EOD Tech, Mike -

From Larry's website -

This is Mike’s first book, and it is a darn good one that deserves to be read. For those of you who don’t know, Mike is an EOD Technician, currently defusing roadside bombs in Afghanistan. He will still be in Afghanistan, risking his life and being awesome, when his first novel appears in stores. Places like NPR can talk about thriller writer street cred, but Mike plays high-explosive chess against terrorist IEDs before breakfast. Most first time authors are super excited to do their first book signings, but Mike can’t because he’s deployed… Think about that for a second… He can’t do book signings for the really nifty book he wrote because he is too busy DEFUSING MURDER BOMBS.

For most authors, the most exciting part of our day is when we spill Coke Zero on our keyboard. EOD are complete lunatics that do something so absurdly dangerous that complete snake eating warriors look at them and say F’ that noise, let the dude in the big suit play with the booby trapped death machine.

BUY THIS AND BUY IT NOW!!!

Hitler Learns Attack Watch.Com Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure In ONLY 24 Hours.

Oh, and Obama is a Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure as well.

Just in case anyone had forgotten....

A Blast From The Past

Re-posted from a time long ago, in a Blog far, far away...

29 April 2006

My evening in Hell at The Brokeback Bar and Grill

I thought I was going to "The Worst Little Roadhouse from Texas" with the Ol' Lady and some friends for a birthday dinner, I wound up in a cattle car on my way to Dachau.

(O.K., not quite Dachau but I shoulda stayed home.)

I knew things were going in the shitter when the Ol' Lady's cell rang and part of the conversation was "45 min to an hour wait." I have a rule of thumb about restaurants, "No one's food but my own is so fucking good as to have to spend an hour rubbing assholes and elbows with the living dead in the queue." Tonight was NOT the exception to that rule.

No two "steak" joints can agree on what medium is (like good pussy, a good medium steak has a hot, pink center and no blood), and odds are the one I'm at will fuck up a perfectly good piece of over-priced meat, and I hate to piss away $15. I can get two or three identical steaks with my hard-won treasure at the butcher counter at the market for that and cook them correctly at home, imbibing with select friends in quiet and comfort and not jammed up against the unwashed, loud-mouthed masses and their hellish spawn in competition with the shitty selections on the jukebox for most volume.

AND IF I HAVE TO WAIT A FUCKING HOUR TO GET MY FOOD...IT'S BECAUSE I DAMN WELL WANT TO AND NOT BECAUSE OF TEENAGE FUCK-UP COLLEGE KIDS IN THE KITCHEN!!!

I after scanning the menu, I ordered what I thought was the most idiot-proof items I could find, potato skins w/ bacon (for my muslim friends) and cheese, and a cup of "Home-made" chili. Both items came out separately, early, after I specifically told the serving wench "Bring them out with the rest of the meals, not as appetizers." Both were taken back and re-heated instead of being re-prepared.

And as for the "chili"... If it's home-made, it's made at the home of the same guy who cooks up that swill Armour puts in cans and passes off as chili.

Almost forgot about the generic Bloomin' Onion or what the fuck ever they call it that was ordered, forgotten, lied about, quickly prepared, half-cooked and rushed out to the table with a side order of bullshit about "your's was delivered to another table by mistake." My ass... If the Ol' Lady hadn't reminded the serving wench after I told everyone at the table that the above was what happened, we probably never would have seen it.

And now kids, let's take a ride up Brokeback Mounting, er, Mountain...

The birthday boy is gay (If you wanna ride your buddy's saddle, no skin offa my nose, but I don't wanna see the rodeo) and really into the drag-queen scene, and one friend and the Ol' Lady (not so much now) are "drag hags", i.e. drag groupies, so you can guess what a good deal of conversation was about... which queen was in what show, who has what "crown", and how many big gay friends were working at the place, with the occasional "Ohhh, he's cute!!" thrown in.

(Friends husband and I weren't totally deprived though, It was one of the local high school's prom night, so lotsa scantily-clad 17-18 y/o breastages and fine behinds on display. Before you tar and feather me, age of consent in MO. is 17, so the Olsen twins were in season for a whole year here while the rest of you heathens blogged "ONE more year..." so neener, neener, neener)

Anyway, back to the rodeo... After waiting 45 minutes to get jammed into a tiny-ass booth, finding out who was gay and who wasn't, getting a preview of how fucked my dinner was gonna be, we passed the hour between ordering and delivery of dinner with assorted small talk, interrupted occasionally by a would be cheerleader rousing the crowd into a half-assed "Texas-style Yee HAAA for the birthday-boob!!!" and ride on a saddle bolted to a fucking wheeled SAWHORSE, while some poor bastard tries to slide under the table to plot bloody revenge on his "friends".

Eventually they served us (me for the third time), everybody said it was O.K. but not up to usual quality, Friend's Husband's said his was tough and tasted re-heated (prolly prepped too early as well by your local neighborhood kitchen fuck-ups). As I think I mentioned above, an HOUR after ordering and after tables seated after us with bigger parties were served.

Given the fact I KNOW that cruel bitch Fate loves to piss in my Capt. Crunch every chance she gets, I don't know why I never saw the big-assed bowl of crunch berries that was coming to my table until some minion from hell with a lisp plops a 10 year old kid's cowboy hat on B-day boy's head and cheerleader wench is screeching in my ear about "it's your b-day and we're all gonna holler like we have double-digit IQ's and you're gonna ride our idiot-generator on wheels around the place!! Just ignore the luke warm piece of meat you waited an hour for, leave your brain at the table and go do a lap, you can eat your steak cold later!!"

B-day boy waffles between "I wanna eat my dinner" and "OH BOY!! A parade for me!!", Friend is on her feet going "come on, go... you know you wanna go, come on go...", with all the GLAAD-hands in the back ground chanting encouragement, Ol' Lady and Friend's Husband trying to ignore the circus and here I am, stuck in the middle with my .45 trying to figure out if I should shoot them (cheerleading section) or myself.

FINALLY, "dinner" is over, plates cleared and praise be to allah (pork-fat be upon him), the check comes. The FUBAR onion has been deleted, B-day boy's dinner has been comp'ed, and serving wench collects the damage and returns the change, the Ol' Lady sez, "You ready??"...


FREE AT LAST, FREE AT LAST!! THANK GOD ALMIGHTY, FREE AT LAST!!!

(had to restrain myself from doing a Snoopy Happy Dance on the way out the door and I'm not sure, but I think I might've knocked over a blue-haired old lady with a walker on the way out...)

Obama Is A Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure

From Gateway Pundit, I have found out that the Missouri SCOAMF-cock sucking assholes that threatened prosecution of anybody telling the truth spreading smears and lies about SCOAMF, except of course SCOAMF and his smearing, lying SCOAMF-cock sucking assholes, have resurrected their threat for 2012.


They have started a website website where Teh Faithful can rat out their friends and family that have the two brain cells of intelligence and the pico-gram of common sense needed to see thru the bullshit and lies that are Teh Won Twue SCOAMF.


Go to Attack Watch.com and put some truth to these asshole's Stuttering Clusterfuckery.


I dropped them this little Dab o' Truth:

http://www.barrackobama.com

"My God... It's Full Of Lies!!"

Obama is a Stuttering Clusterfuck Of A Miserable Failure

UPDATED AND CORRECTED - 
 
Turns out that this is a Tale of Two Cocksucker stories. The MO. cocksuckers DID NOT start Attack Watch, but they are still up to their old hijinks and are still cocksuckers.

Attack Watch was started by the SCOAMF administration's own cocksuckers.